Rules of the Road Read online

  “Object on road ahead.”

  Jamie gently tapped her brakes to give herself more space from the car in front of her. She scanned the highway ahead to look for the pothole that had popped up on the Driv app. Seeing that the tire-killer was safely in the far lane and not in her own she okayed the popup on the screen. Not for the first time she wished there was some way she could let other drivers know the location of such hazards. Again, the app was limited in that it just warned of a problem, but it could not tell which of the multiple lanes the hazard obstructed. All of a sudden Jamie heard the lyrics to one of her favorite songs and cranked up the volume. “Kill Kill Kill” by The Pierces had come on and she excitedly sang along to the angry lyrics. Her favorite part was the little cat meow in the second half of the song during the hook. It served no purpose, and really didn’t make any sense lyrically, but she loved it and always turned the radio up all the way just before that part in the song. Evening karaoke was in full swing. She made it home and into her designated parking spot in the garage at 4:36 p.m. exactly and she followed the same routine as always when entering her condo. The jacket was hung on a coat hook, as well as her messenger bag. Her lunch cooler was emptied and place on the shelf above the sink. It was Friday and she had plans. She was just throwing together something quick for dinner when her phone beeped and she glanced at the screen where it sat on the counter.

  wut r you doin 2nite, plans?

  She read the text message and seriously thought about how to answer the question. Kim was cute and hot in bed, but she was also about twelve years her junior and not the brightest “buddy” she’d had. Jamie wasn’t really up for explaining the meaning of any long words that came up during her and Burke’s inevitable deep conversation in the wee hours of the morning. She quickly typed back a response.

  Burke is coming up for the weekend, hanging at Culture.

  k, may b next time.

  Culture was one of the gay clubs in St. Seren, the famously liberal city that she lived in. Robby Burke was her best friend and he lived about an hour south, so when he’d come up to club with her he’d just stay the weekend on her futon in her spare room. They had a pretty good system in place for when they went to the club. Burke would buy drinks if Jamie made omelets for breakfast in the morning. And neither one had to drive, instead they’d stumble home together from the bar that was only six blocks from her condo complex. Burke didn’t mind the girls she brought home and she didn’t say anything about his extreme OCD quirks. Like lining up everything in the medicine cabinet by size and color of bottle, all labels facing forward. Okay, so maybe she did say something that time because it was a little creepy to organize someone else’s medicine cabinet. But otherwise they were best friends.

  They were only acquaintances before Jamie broke up with her crazy ex-girlfriend years before. Maybe it was because Burke gave her a solidity and an understanding friend when her “perfect” relationship ended. She gave him something that not a lot of trans men and women have, complete and utter acceptance. But over the handful of years they had become “bros” of a sort. Best buds.

  Later that night, Jamie was sitting on one of the low leather couches upstairs, chatting with a girl named Tori. Burke had taken over the pool table about twenty feet away from them. Tori abruptly drained her beer and playfully climbed into Jamie’s lap. She traced the collar on the engineer’s shirt and leaned close enough to be heard over the thump of the house music. “So, do you live nearby? Wanna hang out after the bar closes?” The way she leaned down pressed her breasts firmly against Jamie’s chest. While Jamie didn’t have much in the way of cup size, her nipples hardened painfully when Tori gave a little shimmy against her.

  Jamie took a slow sip of her own beer to appear calm and collected, though in reality her heart was racing. “My friend Burke is staying with me for the weekend, but you’re welcome to come over. I usually make us omelets and we put on some music. The walls of my condo are thick so my neighbors never complain.” The woman in her lap smiled at her. Tori’s pixie cut red hair appeared darker in the low light of the second floor, and Jamie appreciated a woman with green eyes and a sweet little dimple. “I also have more beer at my place. And if you decide that you absolutely shouldn’t drive afterwards, you can always share my bed with me. I’m positive I have something that you can wear.”

  A dark red brow rose with the innuendo in Jamie’s voice. “Oh? And just what would I be wearing?”

  Jamie had played the game a lot since she split with her ex. She knew what was expected of her, she knew the things to say. She had rules, and she made sure that any “friends” understood those rules thoroughly before letting nature take its course. She lowered her voice just slightly and looked the younger woman straight in the eyes. “Me, of course. As long as you’re just looking for a little fun tonight. I have a strict no dating rule. I’m kind of an asshole about it and I won’t change my mind.”

  Tori shrugged. “I’d heard that about you already and I don’t have a problem with it. You’re hot and you’re funny, and tonight I’m free.”

  Jamie was taken aback for a second, not liking the fact that her personal life was fodder for the gossip mill. “Who told you that?”

  “Jenn. But don’t worry, stud, she’s like one of my closest friends. We tell each other everything.” Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, the woman on the bottom squirmed a bit remembering Jenn. The redhead smirked at her. “And yes, she told me how you broke her heart.”

  “Hey, it wasn’t like that! I told her from the start that things were only going to be casual. She tried to change the rules.”

  Tori laughed and shoved the taller woman back down with an easy hand to the chest. “Hey, calm down. She already told me that it was her own fault. She said that she fell for you despite your warnings. You’re still friends, right? Coffee buddies or something?” Jamie nodded. “Then we’re all good. I told her I would fuck you if I could ever get you alone, and here we are.”

  And there it was. At the mere mention of fucking, Jamie was ready to leave the bar. She quickly drained her beer and checked her watch. It was twenty minutes to lights up. She glanced at Burke and saw that her friend was just putting up the pool stick for the night. Jamie lightly tapped Tori’s thigh indicating she should move off her lap, then called out across the second floor. “Hey Burke, dude we’re ready to go. Are you?

  He nodded and drained his own beer before setting it on the bar nearby. “Yeah, man. Is your friend coming back with us?”

  Jamie looked at Tori. “How much have you had to drink?”

  The redhead looked curiously back at her. “Two beers tonight, why?”

  The engineer grinned. “She’s driving us back to the condo and I’ll make omelets and tater tots!”

  Tori laughed and stood, then took Jamie’s hand and pulled her up as well. “Shouldn’t you be feeding me breakfast tomorrow morning, not tonight?”

  Jamie leaned in and brought her lips close enough to Tori’s ear to kiss the smaller woman’s lobe. “I’m thorough. I’ll feed you coming and going.”

  Before she could back away again Tori grabbed her by the short blonde hair and pulled her down into a hot kiss. Burke just shook his head and started for the stairs, glad he brought the headphones he could sleep in.

  The next morning Jamie woke to the sound of music jangling from a nearby cell phone. She looked at her own sitting quietly on the wireless charger and figured it must be Tori’s. She nudged the comatose woman. “Hey, your phone is ringing.”

  The redhead had her back to Jamie and the taller woman finally got a glimpse of her tattoo in the daylight. It was a giant Gemini symbol. Tori grunted. “Ungh! It’ll stop soon.” Just as predicted the phone stopped ringing but started again mere seconds later.

  “Uh, yeah, I think someone really wants to talk to you. I’ll just go grab it.” Jamie hopped out of the bed completely nude to retrieve the phone that was in Tori’s back pocket.

  Tori blearily opened her eyes. “It’s not a
big deal, its either Jenn or John.”

  Without looking at the screen she handed it over to the still prone body and started to get dressed. Hoody and boxers were her normal Saturday morning attire. A perfect outfit for cooking breakfast. “Who’s John?”

  “That’s my fiancé‎ .”

  Jamie looked up from stuffing her feet into fuzzy gray elephant slippers. “Excuse me?”

  Tori waved a casual hand at her. “Oh, it’s fine! He knows I’m bi and said as long as I don’t sleep with other guys, he’s cool with an open relationship. We have an arrangement.”

  The taller woman just stared at her overnight guest. She blinked slowly and tried to make sense of the words. She wasn’t happy that she took home someone who was in a relationship, because she had rules. Even understanding the circumstances as Tori explained them, she still wasn’t happy. Finally she made the decision to simply shrug it off and let it go. Tori was definitely a one and done. She didn’t say anything more because the younger woman started talking on the phone. Instead she went to start breakfast like a good host. When she walked out of her room and down the stairs she found Burke reclining on the couch, watching an episode of Grey’s on his laptop. As soon as he saw her he paused it and popped out his ear buds. Burke usually got up early so he almost always watched something on his computer to avoid waking her with the sound of the TV. “Where’s Tabby?”

  “Tori.”

  “Where’s Tori?”

  Jamie shuffled her way to the kitchen to start coffee. “She’s talking to her fiancé‎ on the phone.”

  Burke stood up from the couch and was startled for a second. “Her what?”

  “Fiancé‎ .” She walked into the kitchen and Burke followed.

  “Dude!”

  Jamie nodded. “Yes, he’s a dude.”

  Her best friend waved his hand through the air. “No, dude! Seriously? What the fuck?”

  The engineer stared into her friend’s eyes and he stared back, then they both cracked up laughing. “I know, right?”

  Tori suddenly popped her head around the corner of the stairs, holding the cell phone to her chest. “Do you mind if John comes over to have breakfast with us?” The other two in the kitchen just stared at her in response. “What? He’s bi too so he’s like cool with the whole gay and trans thing.” The engaged redhead waved her hand around to encompass both Jamie and Burke in her statement of her fiancé‎ ’s acceptance.

  Another slow blink and finally Jamie sighed then shrugged. “Sure, why not? Invite him over, the more the merrier!”

  As soon as Tori left the kitchen again Burke leaned toward his absolutely best friend in the entire world. “Dude!”

  Jamie nodded and continued measuring coffee into the basket. “Yeah, I know. I’m stopping at the clinic tomorrow to get tested.” You could never be too careful and, she had rules. After that, not another word was said about it. Geminis were insane.

  AS KELSEY DROVE home she couldn’t help but notice the little nerd car icon ahead of her on the highway. She had been using the Driv app for nearly a year and loved a lot of the little details. She had a little rainbow car icon that other drivers could see on the map if they had that feature turned on. Kelsey left hers on because the icons were cute.

  “Hindernis voraus auf der Straße.”

  “Oh for the love of Pete!” She realized too late that she had forgotten to change the language back to something she could understand. She could see on the map there was an obstacle ahead but luckily the large pothole wasn’t in her lane. There was a car with a flat not much farther down the road that had clearly fallen victim to its concrete maw. She gave a quick swipe from left to right on her screen. “Pothole, far left lane. Car with flat just ahead.” She noticed at lunch that her app had updated and was delighted to see a new voice pin feature that let you record your own description fairly hands-free. It was much better than playing the cup game across three lanes of traffic, trying to guess where the obstacle was on the road.

  At 4:50 p.m. Kelsey pulled into the apartment complex where she had being living for the past few months. She originally lived in the opposite direction from work but she hated the area and she had always wanted to live in St. Seren, which was a notoriously liberal city. They had a thriving music and art scene, as well as a large LGBTQ community. Not that she could give any sort of testimonial on it. She didn’t know a lot of people in town and had yet to check out any of the bars since the move.

  After trudging the three floors to her apartment she opened the door and found herself immediately accosted by two black and white tuxedo cats. Brothers, they were adopted from a rescue program near her dentist’s office. “Hello Pierre, hello Newman. I see you haven’t starved yet but you’re in danger of doing so any second.” She tossed her wallet on the small table by the door and dropped the keys into the dish right next to it. Once her shoes were swapped out for fuzzy socks she kept by the door, her evening had begun. “Hello my handsome boys! What should we have for dinner tonight, hmm?” The handsome boys in question meowed and twined around her legs, desperate for their small portions of canned food. “Salmon pâté?”

  “Mrow!”

  “Oh, good choice!” She scooped a third of the can into a cat dish then popped a lid on the remainder and set the can back in the fridge. The cats immediately began to gorge themselves on the wet food. Kelsey glanced from them to the full dish of dry food, then back to the fat tomcats. “You two are idiots.” She made her way to the bathroom and checked herself in the full-length mirror. She stared at her image for a minute, taking in all that she was and wasn’t. Her mid-length auburn hair was French braided to stay out of her way during working hours. She wore mint green scrubs that featured little tiny teeth and toothbrushes all over the pants and the top. Her eyes were a strange dark green that she inherited from her Irish mother. Her skin color and darker hair was from her dad’s Hispanic side. It was a weird combination that more than one person had commented on. Beyond that, the thing that got noticed most was her curves. She had the hips and she had the tatas, and her waist came in just right between. Since her mom was a skinny little thing she assumed the curves came from the Ramirez side as well. There were many times she wished that she was a skinny girl too but her mama had always raised her to be grateful for what she had. Kelsey made a face in the mirror. Following her mama’s advice wasn’t the problem. She wanted someone else to be grateful for what she had.

  She sighed at her own neediness and left the room. The cats were back underfoot, as if to thank her for a meal well-served. “What should we do with ourselves boys?” Newman stayed underfoot while Pierre jumped onto the kitchen counter and knocked off one of the takeout menus. When Kelsey bent down to pick it up a smile lit her face. “Good boy, Pierre! Chinese food it is! Then tonight is going to be Netflix and chill, the singles edition. Suddenly the brunette thought about the state of her nightstand. Her gaze lazily took in the stocky black and white tuxedo cats. “Do you think they’d bring me batteries with my Pad Thai?” Newman meowed. “No? You’re probably right. Of course, they’d probably bring me some sort of drugs if they knew I was asking advice from my cats.” Pierre sneezed and Kelsey went to check the drawer of her nightstand for batteries.

  Chapter Two

  HALSEY BELTED OUT the lyrics to “Gasoline” and Jamie sang along to the music while she maneuvered Monday morning’s highway hell. Occasionally she would stop the serenade to berate her fellow drivers. “What the fuck, dude? Did you forget how to drive over the weekend?” She slammed on her brakes when a minivan sporting a “Jesus Saves” bumper sticker cut in front of her with no blinker. “You’re making Jesus’ job harder lady, stop driving like you’re on your way to rapture!” She started singing again only to be interrupted by the chime of her Driv app.

  “Pothole center lane.”

  Jamie startled at the unfamiliar voice that came over her sound system. She reached up and slapped her dash then brought her hand back down to her lap, accidentally brushing the scre
en of the phone. “Holy shit, Nigel! This is what I’ve been talking about! Now why couldn’t you tell me that, hmm? Because you’re a pretentious summabitch and you don’t know how to give specific instructions, that’s why. The app must have updated, nice!” She glanced at the screen just as a popup box disappeared and saw a little rainbow car ahead of her on the road map, then put on her blinker and switched out of the center lane. She was coming up to a busy exit but sometimes rules had to be broken. Jamie was surprised when her app chimed again.

  “Excuse me? Who is Nigel?”

  The engineer had just taken a sip from her travel mug and nearly choked when someone answered her diatribe against Nigel. “Okay, now that’s weird.” With only half her mind on the road, she tried to figure out what she had done to answer her fellow driver. “I didn’t do anything, just slapped my dash. Could it be noise activated?” She talked her way through the riddle the same way she would any problem. She saw that the rainbow car was flashing on her screen because it was the one that dropped the voice pin, so she tapped it. Nothing happened so she kept tapping the icon while the little car was still flashing and something that looked like a voice recorder popped up. “Oh! Uh, hey, sorry about that. I didn’t know that the app could let us record messages and I was just talking to Nigel.” She paused for a few seconds and the popup disappeared.